Mom

I have tried to write this blog several times over the past week....I just don't know how to do it, or even if I should. Let me go back...

I started this blog about a year ago as a way to express my love of pop culture, books, gossip and a place to write. I have loved writing since the 7th grade and have always wanted to write a book. As you can see from my limited posts, I haven't been very successful. Here I am, one year later, back in an attempt to re-focus on my blog....but for an entirely different reason. There is no easy way to say it...or even write it.....my Mom, the best person I know, my best friend, has Stage IV Lung Cancer.

My Mom raised me and growing up and even now...it has been me and her against the world. How do we battle this when I can't even think about the future without falling apart?? I am an only child and my 'biological donor' is not in the picture...so this feels so lonely. It sounds selfish, but I am so scared. Scared for me, scared for her, scared for the future, scared for the unknown. I don't even know how to begin to deal.

In some odd way...here I am again back at the blog in an attempt to deal, in an attempt to distract myself, in an attempt to create some new normal, because I feel like my life is forever changed and nothing will be ok again.

In searching for something....I found someone who has faced this evil demon, and says it all in a much better way than I can. Please visit my new bloggie friend Nikki over at Raindrops on Wednesday and read her story.